Prior to the pandemic, I had planned what I wanted to write and amusingly this topic might be more useful to everyone than I thought. The main concept is: finding the balance. We’re going to go through utilising time effectively, identifying goals BUT also having fun and staying happy.
***some transparency***
When I graduated from university, I was a little lost….maybe not a little, quite lost. The nursing degree takes up so much time, energy and sacrifice that I actually had no social life. I’d never been clubbing, I hadn’t got myself drunk, I never saw my uni friends...(I still loved my uni life though). Like all good things, university came to an end and suddenly I found myself with a job and lots of free time. Of course, I was adjusting to my new job and there was a lot to learn but compared to 16 years of blood, sweat and tears from the uk schooling system, this was easier.
Then, a couple months into my job, it hit me, this was going to be my job for the rest of my life. (I’m still not over the fact that at 16, you have to decide what you want to do forever but hey ho, we’re here now). Anyway, I was confused. School has a pre-decided structure that you follow and every year, you’re working towards something. In adulthood, life just hits you in the face and expects you to somehow work everything out.
***reality shock over***
THINGS YOU WILL NEED:
- A piece of paper
- A pen
- OR you could scrap both and open up ‘notes’ on your phone.
STEP 1: PRIORITIES
We all have different priorities. If my priority is getting married and your priority is becoming the CEO, it does not mean that you are better than me or vice versa. Leave that judgement here and go on to work out what your priorities are, by concentrating on what is important to *you*. This can be one thing or ten things, it does not matter, for now jot all of these down. These can be anything eg. Paying back student loans, buying a house, taking up fashion classes etc.
STEP 2: FINDING PASSION
Are you passionate about the things that are your priorities? If so the skip to step 3. If not let’s do a quick side step and find things you are also passionate about.
I think the most difficult part is finding what you are passionate about. Especially for us brown kids because somewhere along the line the things, the things we love, are forgotten or neglected (temporarily). In the process, we enter a limbo. For me those were things like playing musical instruments, singing, swimming, you get the gist.
How do we find passion?
For others it comes easier than some. Some people are immediately able to identify what they love and others have never had the opportunity to explore their options. Fortunately, every cloud has a silver lining. It requires our own effort to find our passion (no surprise).
1. If you can’t remember something you loved, get ready to start tapping away, the internet is vast. The world has grown in a way that there are now so many things we can do and experience. It’s within your own fingertips.
2. You have to be bold and ready to accept failure. Don’t assume if someone is good at something that you will also be good at it but also use the people around you as inspiration. Don’t be afraid to try something new and completely random.
Now, also jot these down.
NB: this can be anything from learning a new language to being a CEO.
STEP 3: SETTING YOUR GOALS
Now that you have a whole list. You split them into two parts. WORK and LIFE. Which of those passions are going to help your progress with your full-time job (if you don’t have a full time job then it doesn’t matter, anything career based will fall under this category) and which of those will feed your soul. For me, the ‘WORK’ section were things that would help me climb the career ladder. I wanted/needed to do them but I’m also very passionate about them. The ‘LIFE’ section included things such as blogging, vlogging, saving up for a house and learning a new language.
NOW, there is a fine line between both. Eg. for people whose careers ‘feed their soul’. It’s completely up to you when it comes to dividing your goals as this is just a rough idea.
STEP 4: ACHIEVING YOUR GOALS
OK, the easiest way to achieve your goals, is to break it down to basics.
Include deadlines if you need to. That word might bring PTSD to some of you, so just remember, these are deadlines you’ve set yourself. They’re flexible and if you were not able to achieve something by a certain point. It does not matter. You evaluate the goal, see where you went wrong and try again. Failure is a lesson.
Back to the main point, go to the top of your list, read each goal and make bullet points. Bullet points that include what you need to do in order to achieve your goal and a potential time frame (not all goals need a time frame).
Eg. Buying a house
- Set up a savings accounts (asap)
- Sort out finances (within 2 weeks)
- Look up mortgages (over the next 2 months)
STEP 5: FRAME IT
Is your dream becoming a reality yet? If it seems impossible to achieve a certain goal, go back to the goal and revise it. You might have missed out extra baby steps that you need to do before getting to the bigger picture. If you know someone, has achieved a similar goal, ask them how they got there. As cliche as it sounds, anything is possible.
Now you have to put this somewhere where you can see it. If you want no-one to see it, keep it somewhere discreet but somewhere you visit often. If you don’t care...get a friend/sibling (whatever floats your boat) to do the same, share your lists with each other and motivate each other to keep achieving your goal. Any method works, what is important is that you can look at the list to see if you’re on track.
NB: My list lives on the back of my yearly planner.
STEP 6: FINDING THE BALANCE
Congrats, if you got this far. The final step comes down to one skill. Time management. Some people manage their time by making time schedules, others make tick boxes and tick everything off as they do it.
I’m not going to tell you how to manage time. Your time is yours. Now that you have a list to reflect on. Work out what you need to do right now to achieve some of those goals. Your goals will not be achieved by tomorrow, but something you do today can change your tomorrow.
E.G.
- I can go online and set up a savings account.
- I can also set up a direct debit into the savings account so that every month, money is going in.
Now, the reason I said make two lists is because when managing your time accordingly, never forget your ‘LIFE’ list, because work is work, I love my job and I wouldn’t give it up even if you offered me a million pounds but outside of work, I have things to accomplish. These things will also make me happy and improve my quality of life. When you plan your day, your week or your month, there should be an equal amount of both. Finding the balance takes trial and error but believe in the process...and yourself.
That’s it.
If that went over your head, I’m sorry, please let me know and I’ll try to explain it better.
Thank you for reading :)
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